Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
nutella sex= disaster
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Randomize
