Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
