Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
