But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
