not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
