lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
