did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
