she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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