home. puking in laundry basket.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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