i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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