therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
