We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
