it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize