oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize