Where is the hickey?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
