I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
My vagina just clenched in fear
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
