I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
