Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
