I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
