what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize