When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
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