Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
