I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
