I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I pour the whiskey from now on
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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