Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
