if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
