If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
