she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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