Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
