does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
