I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
