I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
