"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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