it was like eating out sand paper
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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