in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
