at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
