Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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