he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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