I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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