I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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