I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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