Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
