I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
