Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
