Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize