Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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