Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
