whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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