sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
