I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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